Random Randomness, 5/14/2015

Why? Because the Iron Laws of Probability demand it.

Rather than proceed with my usual smattering of random anecdotes about random stuff that’s caught my attention the past couple of weeks, I think I’ll offer a random list of random song lyrics.

This is a sampling of those deathless ditties that everybody recognizes, nobody understands, and absolutely no one gets right when they try to sing along. You know what I’m talking about.

WARNING: These incoherent earworms may induce road rage and spontaneous nosebleeds. Do not read while driving, do keep a spare tissue and bottle of ibuprofen at hand, and, for the love of all that’s good and true, suspend all logical analysis, lest the madness consume you.

Perhaps they make sense in some alternate universe where fish carry briefcases, children obey their parents, and a purple shirt coordinates with green slacks and argyle socks. Or not. It really doesn’t matter…sometimes trying to impose reason on something silly sucks the fun right out of it.

From the Broadway play, “The Echo,” 1910 (resurrected for a new generation by the 1980s children’s variety program, “The Elephant Show”), “Skidamarink a-Dink a-Dink”:

elephant showSkidamarink a-dink, a-dink, Skidamarink a-doo, I love you.
I love you in the morning and in the afternoon
I love you in the evening and underneath the moon.
Skidamarink a-dink, a-dink, Skidamarink a-doo, I love you.

When your Lovely Wife is a kindergarten teacher, this song haunts your nightmares.

 

From The Chips, 1956 (covered by The Blues Brothers in 1978), “Rubber Biscuit”:

BluesBrothersHeere odda hilldidda hildhiruhah
Juuuyr adda hilldadida jigguwah
Hieere odda hittomamma jizzowazzah
Hoow bawlda hiwowiwa hiwiwah
Heere odda hilldeninne hilldennine
Hiiire odda hillimoney hilluwowahwah
Dwiire odda higgunama shuppobup
Deare odda hildumama hithuivha
Puurr onna hillimona hillduwiva

I have no idea what it means, but Jake and Elwood sure looked cool singing it.

 

From the Broadway musical, “The Music Man,” 1957, “Shi-Poo-Pi”:

the music manBut a woman who waits ’til the third time around,
Head in the clouds, feet on the ground!
She’s the girl he’s glad he’s found–she’s his
Shi-Poo-Pi! Shi-Poo-Pi! Shi-Poo-Pi! Shi-Poo-Pi!
The girl who’s hard to get!
Shi-Poo-Pi! Shi-Poo-Pi! Shi-Poo-Pi!
But you can win her yet!

I doubt My Lovely Wife would appreciate me calling her My Shi-Poo-Pi, but so she is.

 

From the Broadway musical, Hair, 1967, “Good Morning Starshine”:

hairGliddy glup gloopy
Nibby nabby noopy la la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba
Nooby abba nabba le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba nabba
Early morning singing song

Oh, if only I could drop this gloopy song into the nibby nabby Crack of Doom along with the tooby ooby One Ring…

 

From The Police, 1980,”De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da”:

policeDe do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
They’re meaningless and all that’s true

Ah, the sound of one hand clapping.

 

 From the Broadway musical, Grease, 1991, “We Go Together”:

greaseWe go together
Like rama lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong
Remembered forever
As shoobop sha wadda wadda yippity boom de boom
Chang chang changitty chang shoobop
That’s the way it should be, wha ooohhhh, yeah

“Remembered forever?” I get lost after the first rama lamma lamma.

 

From Nirvana, 1991, “Smells Like Teen Spirit”:

nirvanaLoad up on guns, bring your friends
It’s fun to lose and to pretend
She’s over-bored and self-assured
Oh no, I know a dirty word

You can pick just about any snippet from a Nirvana song and it will work here. Go ahead…try it!

 

From Barenaked Ladies, 1998, “One Week”:

oneweekChickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’
Watchin X-Files with no lights on,
We’re dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man’s in this one
Like Harrison Ford I’m getting Frantic
Like Sting I’m Tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy

This one almost makes sense, but perhaps it’s because I wear my mind on my sleeve and have a history of losing my shirt.

Enough already. If I’ve missed your favorite bit of gibbering nonsense, feel free to mention it in my very empty comment box…if you dare.

UPDATE: 05/15/15: On Facebook, an old high school chum noted one I’d missed, which brought yet another to mind, and they were both too good to omit, so…

From The Kingsmen, 1963, “Louie Louie”:

kingsmenLouie Louie, oh no
Me gotta go
Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said
Louie Louie, oh baby
Me gotta go

I always thought this chorus sounded like an urgent plea to use the “facilities,” but in the verses, which nobody listens to, the minstrel pines for his love in faraway Jamaica.

From Sam the Sham and the Pharoahs, 1965, “Wooly Bully”:

sam-the-shamHatty told Matty, “Let’s don’t take no chance.
Let’s not be L-seven, come and learn to dance.”
Wooly bully, wooly bully
Wooly bully, wooly bully, wooly bully.

The other verses are no help here, but who cares? I can’t stop singing “wooly bully” over and over again.

 

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